My job requires that I be organised and, to be honest, it doesn’t stop there.
I’ve always been a planner. I’m the one in my group of friends who’s always setting up the get-togethers. I plan my birthday to the letter, often months in advance (if I’m totally honest, I’m usually thinking about it a few days after it’s over!). I plan dinners, group getaways, even my gym classes are mapped out a week in advance.
Sometimes, I feel it’s a bit extreme. Ok, I’ll admit the gym is extreme, but I try to match classes with my sister and nowadays we have a bit of a routine so I don’t need to plan it out as much. Anyways, what was I saying? Yes, sometimes I feel it’s extreme but then I consider whether anyone else would do it and often the answer is no, which means we don’t do anything or go anywhere. I have very few planner friends. Or maybe they just don’t plan to my satisfaction?
In the last year, I’ve started studying a full-time degree via correspondence. This in addition to my usual full time job plus a one – two night waitressing gig at my partner’s bar and, my most recent commitment, trying to post to this blog every day. I have less free time than I’ve ever had in my entire life and my urge to organise feels like it’s kicked into overdrive. I come home, unpack my gym bag, check my calendar and weather app then repack my bag for the next day (have to make sure I’ve packed the right outfit based on weather conditions and scheduled meetings, etc. Come on, surely everyone does this?), have dinner and then the remainder of my time is relegated to uni stuff, this blog and/or balancing my finances, etc.
What a life. Everything’s so regimented. If I take a night off just to watch the latest episodes of Game of Thrones or House of Cards, I feel myself panic slightly at the loss of time left to do “real” stuff. You see, I think what bothers me is the passing of time with no real purpose. I have to DO something with every waking moment. I have to plan my weekends so I have plenty of “stuff” to do each day, so I feel accomplished and like I’ve checked things off my to-do list. Sometimes I feel guilty for wanting a weekend day with absolutely nothing planned or for spending a rainy day on the couch watching TV.
It’s crazy, right? What’s important here? Surely, it’s about quality time and doing what you want and what makes you happy. You can’t cram something into every waking moment of the day. There needs to be SOME downtime and I need to get OK with it. My organising is good I many ways, I think. But I need to chill the fuck out and not try and plan every waking second. Leave some space for spontaneity.
Well, I’ll try.
Fact #5: The one thing I don’t organise is my partner and my overseas holidays. He takes charge of most of that stuff. We decide where to go and then he ends up looking into all the flights and accommodation. I just weigh in at the end. I’m not entirely sure whether this is intentional on his part but it just seems to always pan out this way. I organise the majority of our day to day social life (dinners, concerts, etc.) and he takes the massive annual adventure. I think it works. 🙂