Another uni assignment posted for your reading pleasure (hopefully). Part of a portfolio that got an overall Distinction.
Dear Sydney Buses
I appreciate what you’re doing for us, I really do, and so I thought I’d send you this letter so you can be aware of the wonderful benefits I’ve seen since I started using your services. I’ll list them in bullet form so you can easily pull out any points you’d like to include in future media releases extolling the virtues of your wonderful transportation system.
Here we go:
- Sydney Buses have increased my fitness. I have become much swifter on my feet thanks to all the extra running required to catch the buses that decide arriving early is a good thing to do. Often I think I have seven or eight minutes until the next service arrives, only to get to the top of my hill and see the bus turning the corner, a mere 45 seconds from my bus stop. I’ve become an excellent sprinter, thanks to you. Who knows? A few more years like this and I might try out for the Olympics.
- I have increased my technological capabilities. Because a paper bus timetable is no longer reliable or even a thing that exists, I paid the three dollars something for a Sydney Transport app that would be able to tell me, with reasonable accuracy, when my next bus would arrive. This piece of software is a marvellous thing. I can watch my bus approaching with a sense of ease that quickly morphs into wonder when I see that my bus has vanished into thin air. Clearly, your buses have discovered a wormhole. Do you just get everyone to their destination quicker or do you teleport them to a galaxy far, far, away? I live in permanent anticipation of the day I’m lucky enough to ride on one of your disappearing buses, instead of just watching it on my app.
- I now have a sense of adventure. You say the bus will be there at 10am every day, which is great, and if it was actually there at 10am every day that would also be great but admittedly quite boring. When you say it’s going to be there at 10am but really it could be there at 9.47am or 10.08am or maybe not at all, that makes things interesting. Will I get to work on time? Will I be late to my friend’s dinner? Will I arrive at all? It’s like a constant game of roulette with my job, my social plans – hell, even my life (considering the chance that the bus could be there, pick me up and then promptly disappear).
- Which brings me to my next point: my friends and me have a bit of a betting system going to see if the buses will be late or early or if they’ll even come at all. I’m at the top of the leaders’ board at the moment and, if I ever get on one of those disappearing buses, I stand to win quite a bit of money. If I’m around to collect it, that is.
So you see, Sydney Buses, you’re doing a bang up job and I thought it was high time someone gave you the praise you deserve. I hear other people complaining about reliability and “smells” (whatever that means) but I love you. You’ve enriched my life beyond measure and, for that, I thank you.
Image credit: ItsFunny.org