Oh my god, it’s week 12, the second last week of the semester. I’m nearly finished my first study period back and, I’ve gotta say, I’m feeling pretty good about it. Hell, I’m aiming to finish my final assignment early so I get week 13 (or at least part of week 13) off. Look at me go. Part time study is sooo much less stressful (obviously). Still, a small, masochistic part of me wants to up the ante to full time just so I can be finished sooner. The end seems so far away. This time 2018, when the fuck is that? It’s a million years away, who knows what I’ll be doing then? This time next year? Now that sounds reachable, like it’s just beyond my fingertips but if I stretch really, really hard for a really long time (and use the Jedi mind trick), I’ll get there.
But then I remember how stressed I was studying full time. How every moment away from my studies felt like a moment stolen, like I didn’t deserve it. I couldn’t enjoy myself because my mind kept reminding me of all the shit I had to do at home. What kind of life is that? Then again, my current life is incredibly cruise-y in the grand scheme of things. It could stand to be shook up a little. Or maybe not. Maybe I’m just always unhappy with whatever my current state of affairs is, on a permanent ‘the grass is always greener’ kick.
I’ve just booked myself in for the remaining two study periods for the year, which takes me up to end of February. Maybe once I get through study period three, after the wedding, I’ll think about going full time. But then that’s summer. Who wants to be a full time student in summer? Fuck that, it’s party time. Gah! There’s always an excuse, if you’re looking for it. Or maaaaybe, maybe I’ll sign up for a second uni this study period and see how it goes. I can ditch it without penalty in week 3 if things are looking drastic. Hmmmmm… maybe. Let’s see what unit takes my fancy. Have to decide soon though.
Actually, no, I just checked and the cut off day was Sunday. Dammit! Of course, now I really want to give full time a try. Can’t do it next study period because the wedding’s smack bang in the middle and attempting full time then would be actual madness. Ok, study period four – I’m looking at you. But that’s summer. GODDAMMIT! Classic me.
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